Let Go - May 5, 2022

“Many of us have been trying to keep the whole world in orbit with sheer and forceful application of mental energy. What happens if we let go, if we stop trying to keep the world orbiting and just let it whirl? It’ll keep right on whirling. It’ll stay right on track with no help from us. And we’ll be free and relaxed enough to enjoy our place on it.” -Melody Beattie

Yes, I like things to go just the way I planned. And they often do, until they don’t. Then what? I wish I could just throw my hands up in the air, say, “Oh well, it’s not the end of the world” and laugh it off. I’m working on that. Of course, some of these things do, in fact, feel like the end of the world. The operative word being “feel.” It seems I feel most things deeply. There are those life events and setbacks that are big and it’s not our first reaction to slough it off. As it should be. But I find I can have the same reaction to the smaller things as I do the big things. One of the downsides of learning how to deal with chronic pain* is the thought that everything’s just one small step away from freaking out. The small things can feel like the big ones. I admit, it’s not a good place to live.

Letting go has never been easy for me. I leave claw marks on everything I eventually cast aside. Like hanging on for dear life to the bar on the roller coaster ride, knowing you’d feel so much freer if you just fling your arms straight up to the sky, toss your head back and let your hair fly in the breeze.

I aspire to live a freer life. I suppose it’s a daily journey, each time releasing a little more tension off the tight reins I hold. Each day, my faith in where my help comes from gets stronger.

“Therefore, do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” -Matthew 6:34

Ain’t that the truth! Why borrow trouble from tomorrow when there is more than plenty in today? “Stay present.” “Live in this day.” “Practice mindfulness.” We hear these statements often. We even agree with them. We’re just not so good at “doing” them. It’s always good for me to keep these reminders front and center, recalling one of the best sayings to live by, “Let go and let God.”

I have a visual in my mind. Each problem is a balloon with a long string. The balloons arrive every day. One by one, I release my hold on the string and let the problem float up to God for Him to take care of.

“Letting go is hard but being free is beautiful.” -anonymous

*For background on my health condition, (Central Sensitization Syndrome) see previous post on November 12, 2021, titled, "Three Years Ago Today." In addition to CSS, my diagnoses include Fibromyalgia, Hashimotos Thyroiditis, Severe spinal disk degeneration, Bilateral hip replacement complications, Small fiber neuropathy, Morton's Neuroma, Burning Mouth and Osteoporosis.